In simple prose, this book [How Did We Get Here?] reveals the profound truth of trauma. If we want to survive as a species, we must stop the emotional and physical abuse of childhood. We must abandon cultural norms based upon deeply flawed philosophical musings about human nature going back thousands of years. We must recognize that we are emotional beings, not rational beings. Only in this way can we stop the cycle of trauma that Judith Barr bears testament to.
I LOVE this book [How Did We Get Here?]! I hope it reaches everyone on the planet!
Wonderful work! I pray the world may one day thank you for it!!
Judith Barr has helped me to explore and heal areas in my inner-landscape where I had been stuck. She had a depth and inner wisdom allowing her to hone in on what is truly the root issue from early childhood and to communicate the truth of it in a compassionate and open-hearted manner such that I could hear without being defended. The depth of Judith’s presence has allowed me to feel safe enough to explore where I needed to. In a group setting I have witnessed Judith speak in such a way that every person could personally relate to what was being presented and every person felt she was speaking and connected only to them. I whole-heartedly recommend Judith for anyone looking to do their deep inner-work for healing what’s holding them back from living life to the fullest.
Judith Barr is a teacher and therapist of the highest caliber with an ability to gently reach into the tender inner world of her students and clients allowing them to feel into their inner life and safely explore and bring to awareness experiences and feelings that have been tucked away.
As a participant in a recent money workshop with Judith, I began to understand on a much deeper level what my relationship with money is and how that relationship is a product of having transferred my early relationships with my parents onto my relationship with money. Understanding this brings feelings from your unconscious into your awareness where you can then process and heal your self and reach your greatest potential.
Judith is a gifted and conscious healer who brings to her work a big heart, a clear and focused mind, and great awareness & care to the therapeutic relationship. An engaging and thought provoking speaker, Judith offers profound wisdom and deep insight into how our past experiences and early decisions can shape lives, for better and for worse, and without grandiosity, how therapy can change the world. As an advocate for therapists becoming conscious of their use of power, Judith “walks the talk” – her therapy work demonstrates her clear sense of ethics, selflessness, and sensitivity to the power differential. Judith is one of those rare therapists with the experience and skill to safely guide a person into the abyss and back again, achieving great healing and change.
Thank you, again, for giving us such a wonderful workshop. Everyone loved it. You are truly captivating! That’s the word I have been searching for all day. You had everyone’s attention – and more! If you ever want to come back and do “part 2” as the woman said, we’d love to have you.
Thank you for the precious and inspiring event. It made me and my colleagues from work reflect on what bullying is in a fresh way . . . a different way . . . It was even more to think about than the previous, similar web conference ”There is a Bully in All of Us” where I first came into contact with your work . . .
I was truly amazed at the depth of the definition of bullying that you refer to. What most struck me, of course, was the name: “There is a Bully in All of Us”.
Wait a minute, I thought . . . an unpleasant thought crossed my mind . . . it would mean that there is a bully in me too!
It was a quite non-digestible personal responsibility at first . . . Until then, I had only perceived the phenomenon outside me . . . But later, after listening to the conference, reading through your articles and your other work the tricky truth about the use and abuse of power became more and more obvious to me.
It meant that I would need to take care of my “inner bully” rather than take care of bullies “outside me”. It meant constant awareness on how I use aggression and power . . . It meant greater clarity on what triggers my pain and why is this so . . . It also meant continuous questioning of what is the way of love and what is the way of adversity . . .
I had to slow down and think about the boundaries of my own power. I had to think about how I feed conflict and I had to think about my language and my thoughts of violence . . . It just affirmed what I thought I knew before – that hurt can easily turn into anger.
What is most important, turning inwards to look for the bully within made me realize that I have learned to make a home for it . . . How much of what I say and do can be bullying . . . and how I have allowed and given meaning to something to hurt me . . .
I am so grateful that I have been given the opportunity to learn again . . .
Ms. Barr, I want to thank you for presenting your guest talk of “Transference: A Treasure in Disguise” at the meeting of the New York State Mental Health Counselors Association (NYMHCA) – Westchester Chapter. We are used to having speakers present their areas of expertise in counseling at our chapter meetings. However, your talk was particularly memorable because of the level of engagement it elicited among our group members.
From the beginning of your talk, the content, coupled with your enthusiasm and presentation style, captured the full attention of our group members. Your words about transference truly embodied the heart of therapeutic interaction. In discussing transference, it was clear that you enabled our group members to think about, feel and experience the topic. It was a pleasure to hear you speak at our meeting, and I am grateful that you chose Westchester NYMHCA as a venue to present your professional expertise.
Using Hans Andersen’s fairy tale about the emperor whose vanity lands him naked on parade, Judith Barr explores the stories of many kinds of power. While her accounts are mainly focused on power abuse in families and the helping professions, we know only too well how the same dynamics surround us. In politics, in the corporate world, in church institutions, even in our news sources, we can see many forms of abuse that distort reality, silence questioning, crush empathy, and build empires based on greed, power, and righteous self-aggrandizement.
Because Judith Barr’s parables are enjoyable and deceptively simple, they help to raise consciousness in non-threatening ways. They creep under our defenses to wake us up. Thus they can be used by parents, family therapists, pastoral counselors, and group leaders in their work. They can also be used for self-reflection, for it is not hard to find aspects of ourselves mirrored in them.
I would also like to see this book [Power Abused, Power Healed] as mandatory reading for politicians and CEOs. Everyone claiming authority needs to know the dire consequences to self and to others of the power shadow. When we are not aware, we may find ourselves parading our grandeur and goodness as foolishly as the naked emperor, or as cruelly as any tyrant.
[Regarding Power Abused, Power Healed] This is the best book on power and its abuse by therapists and spiritual leaders since Guggenbuhl-Craig’s trenchant Power in the Helping Professions. Anyone whose therapy or discipleship has gone rotten through no fault of their own will find wisdom and comfort here. It should be required reading for all therapists and healers in training.